The Sicilian serpent

He planted one at the corner of the garden. He liked squash and he figured it would give him plenty to eat.

Here is what happened. He wrote it down in his diary. It shocked the whole neighborhood.

The garden is growing fine. The tomatoes and kale are flourishing. The marigolds are shining like golden star-bursts. The squash is growing normally and that’s good. It has green leaves the size of my palm. I’m amused to see that it has climbed up the Japanese maple. I wonder how far up it can go.

This is the third week since I planted. The squash plant’s leaves cover the entire garden. My cucumbers and tomatoes are stunted from lack of light. The plant is climbing to the top of a hundred foot tall maple tree. White squash flowers are everywhere and I wonder when it is going to produce a squash that I can harvest.

Week four has begun. I am wandering around under the plant. I bump my head on a slender green squash over four feet long. It is hanging down like a giant pendulum. I peer through the dense foliage of the plant and see more squash hanging, some of them over five feet long.

It is week five and the plant has taken over my garden. Now it is after the trees. There is no stopping it. I go into the house. I get some shears and start to slash the plant until the garden is uncovered. The rest of the plant is hanging intact on the maple trees. I don’t think it will survive after the damage I have done to it.

Again, I am mistaken. The plant is back and stronger than ever. It is growing over the roof of the house. I see giant cylinders of squash hanging in front of the windows. This morning I used a machete to hack a path to the street. I don’t know if the house is strong enough to bear the weight of the massive plant and its fruits.

I stay inside. I found out that the leaves are edible. That is a help since I can’t get out of the house anymore to go to the grocery store. It is dark inside even during the daytime. The leaves form an impenetrable blanket over the house.

I didn’t sleep last night. Today something disturbing happened. One of the leaves is in the house. It squeezed through a crack between the edge of the screen and the window frame. I am going to cut it off but I know there is no way to stop it. It knows that I am inside.

I decide to retreat to the bedroom. I am keeping all of the windows shut. I stuffed a blanket under the door. The plant severed the electrical and phone lines.  I have ten percent left on my cell phone battery but no way to charge it.

The door is bulging inwards.

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