Tag Archives: Grumbling Ghosts

The Grumbling Ghosts (Version 2)

They got married last year. For six months they searched online and in-person. Finally they hired a real estate agent.

“I know you like this house but I’m reluctant to sell it to you,” the owner said. “Why” the wife said. “We can give you a larger deposit. You know that the bank approved our mortgage.” The owner nodded. “There’s a problem. Unless I can solve it I’m sorry, I won’t be able to sell you the house.” The wife hung her head. The husband spoke up, “We’ll do anything you want. We can even up the price.”

The owner shook his head. “They don’t like you,” the owner said. “What?” both husband and wife exclaimed. “Who are you talking about, the neighbors?” the husband said. “No, it’s not them. Even though the woman next door acts like a witch she’s not the one who complained.” “Who is it?” the wife said. “You’re going to laugh if I tell you,” the owner said.

“Come on, we’re serious about this house,” the wife said. “Alright, I warned you. The ghosts don’t like you,” the owner said. The husband laughed. “We don’t believe in ghosts,” the husband said. His wife looked uneasy.

“Each time you visit I hear them after you leave. They grumble,” the owner said. “It must be something else,” the husband said. “Maybe you hear someone’s television or radio,” the husband said. “No it’s them, I recognize their voices. They don’t like you,” the owner said. The husband and wife looked at each other in bewilderment. They really wanted this house so they were not ready to give up.

“Why not let us spend the night?” the husband said. “That way the ghosts can get to know us.” He nudged his wife. “Yes, I think that is a great idea,” the wife said. “I can cook dinner for us.” The owner shifted from foot to foot. ‘I don’t know,” he said. “Alright, just one night.”

“You’ll see,” the wife said. “I bet you’ll never hear from the ghosts again.” Back at their apartment the husband decided to search through a news archive for articles about the little village where their dream house was located. He put the name in the search box and clicked.

“Honey, come look at this,” the husband said. The wife looked at the screen and froze. The face on the screen was of the owner they just spoke to.  According to the article he died 75 years ago. It seems he lived with his aging parents who according to the article were quite grouchy. Their son had died in a freak accident and according to the article the house had never been lived in again.

“I think we should keep looking,” the wife said. “I agree,” the husband said.

Grumbling Ghosts (Version 1)

They were fed up.

“I am sick and tired of this. Ooh, ghosts are scary. Ghosts are spooky. Ghosts are bad,” Garrett Ghost said. “I agree,” Ginny Ghost said. “What do they expect from us? We can’t help being invisible.” “I think the thing that bugs me the most is our portrayal in the media,” Garrett Ghost said as he floated over the floor of the haunted house. “If only I could get my hands on the guy who made ‘Ghostbusters’. I’d like to see him walk in our shoes for even a day.”

“Here they come,” Ginny Ghost said in a resigned voice. “Whee! Oh boy, a haunted house,” a young boy said. “Hah, look at those fake ghosts,” a little girl said. She pointed at Garrett and Ginny. “That one is really funny looking,” she sneered as she pointed at Garrett. Ginny Ghost stifled a laugh. “Let’s go to the next room, the ghosts are boring,” the little boy.

“As I said, what is the world coming to? No one appreciates a good ghost any more,” Garrett Ghost said. “There, there dear,” Ginny Ghost said.

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